Being grey means that you're being neither black nor white. You stay there, stagnant. Your whole life is basically just a series of routines that you're fine with, but you're longing for something more.
As I typed this, just now my partner in crime rang me. Told her about the miracles she just experienced and how good God is. I was amazed, speechless.. you name it. It's always amazes me how God just work miraculously through people's lives. My church has been conducting a 'ROCKStimony' series about miracles that church people experienced in their lives recently.
For me, I have been waiting for that to come.
And still am.
To be honest, my life's pretty much like the grey area I mentioned before. I'm fine with it, but I want something more. Something real. Something BIG.
Don't get me wrong, I'm genuinely happy for the miracles my friends had. But I couldn't stop wondering... where's mine? I admit, I haven't been living the greatest life as a Christian, especially in these moments. Lots of problems, troubles coming my way. And sometimes I couldn't help it but ask... "where are You?????"
I know I shouldn't complain.
I know there's always more to life.
But why do I feel this way?
Mungkin masalahnya bukan di dunia, tapi di saya sendiri...
The biggest enemy is not everybody else, but it's yourself.
dammit.
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